The chance

My best friend and I in college swore we would never use the automatic doors in stores.  Why would we?  It’s not that hard to open a door.

Years later, I walk out from Target, through the automatic doors. I think not only has it been years since I used the push doors, but I think about her.

She was my first friend who died.

My first lesson in making sure you end each day with closure.  Her passing taught me to listen to that little voice that says it’s been too long since you have talked to someone.

Because what if either of you were to die?  Did you want to regret that you never told them how much they mean to you?  That sort of regret follows you around for years.  It would be better to call.  To reach out.  To try.

I wonder what our relationship would have been like had she lived.  Would we laugh about how nice it is to use automatic doors?

I wonder if she would have forgiven me, if given the chance.

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