7. You think Chocolate, Coffee, Pizza and Wine are the only food groups
6. You count vacuuming and dusting as exercise
5. You have half a dozen cheater stories started
4. Your house is spotless
3. Your husband says “What is for dinner” and your reply is “contractions are more conversational.”
2. The local pizza delivery shows up every day at 5, no call needed.
1. Your browser history has crazy searches (What goes in a birthing kit? What does a moldy pond smell like? What is the most common underwear color?)